Without You

A little more than ten years ago my mom passed away. For many challenging months she battled brain cancer until Jesus called her home. My mother was a beautifully complex child of God and anyone privileged enough to truly know her can attest to the genuine love freely given to all she encountered. She loved her children, husband, and countless others touched over the course of her brief sojourn. However, there were also those in her life whom she unfortunately had to contend. Individuals who, through incredible immaturity, jealousy, and insecurity, sought to extinguish the light of Christ within her.

The world around us is rapidly crumbling. We see it every day in the headlines, on our streets and even our own homes. It comes as no surprise that a handful of sick, brutish cowards sought to take advantage of the generosity and wisdom my mother often exhibited. Despite it all, her love for Jesus remained steadfast in the face of unimaginable suffering. She gave herself as an offering to so many blessed to know her. My mom, like all mothers, had her struggles but she always aimed for restoration as commanded in scripture. Like many of us, she battled to effectively deal with abuse, personal shortcomings, and the extreme complications of her surroundings. However, she always pursued the quiet walk of obedience that only honest disciples can claim to know.

Finally, brothers, rejoice. Aim for restoration, comfort one another, agree with one another, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you.

2 Corinthians 2:13 (ESV)

I’m often profoundly struck by the obvious childishness exhibited by society’s current aging generation. My parents’ generation for example, known as baby boomers, continue to grace our schools, churches, businesses and seats of power, all be it in ever decreasing numbers. The curtain of their existence is rapidly falling, and we can plainly see the mark they collectively made upon this world. A handful of saints were included in their number whose tireless devotion brought thousands to Christ. However, I’m afraid many more evils now pervade our culture, in no small thanks to their generation’s unique proclivity toward extreme narcissistic sin. This regretful pattern continues as my generation builds upon those same lies and, in all probability, the next group of kids will do the same. And so, it goes on. The increase of wickedness seeks to snuff out righteousness, and the love of most grows ever colder.

And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold. But the one who endures to the end will be saved.

Mathew 24: 12-13 (ESV)

Despite this gloomy outlook, there is a secret mana provided to those who choose to overcome the spirit of the age. (Revelation 2:17). The Lord Himself decided when and where each of us were to be brought into this world (Acts 17:26). In His wisdom, He chose my parents for me and your parents for you. Many experienced trauma, over-indulgence, neglect, or abandonment by parents. While others received love, care, and nurture by devoted moms and dads. Regardless of the circumstances of your upbringing, our Heavenly Father now bids you to run to His arms and there make peace with Him. The day my mom died was the happiest of her life. All the pain, betrayal and stupidity of this world instantly evaporated in the glory of her heavenly Father. Very few of us will ever know the joy which lies just beyond the Jordan due to our stubborn idiotic opinions and selfishness. Yet, there’s hope for those who renounce the foolishness of our generation and cling to the cross of Christ with all our might.

Almost a decade prior to my mother’s passing, I composed a song specifically for her, expressing my overwhelming gratitude for all she had given. Having just begun to teach myself to play the piano, I sang this song for her at my pastoral ordination. We recorded the live performance that day and little did I know just how poignant and meaningful this song would become as she struggled with terminal illness. While none of us know the exact hour we will stand before our Maker, we can be assured we will absolutely do so one day. Will our lives declare a testament to the next generation of the power of the crucified life? Will we be able to point to our failings, our heroics, and in true humility declare all grace and glory belongs to God alone? Every true disciple should strive to enter heaven fully transformed into the image of Christ Jesus. This is what my mother taught me, what I teach my children, and to this day remains her enduring legacy.

I cannot pretend that I have always tried to love you right
Or never once past you by
Still my heart is full love for all you’ve given up and given for me
This boy is now a man and so I understand
The Lord has made us all as we are meant to be

Chorus
Without you by my side 
In all the things I’ve been through
Still I wait and hear your heart 
Calling for me to come home with you

It was through you that I came to be the man that God desires of me
And through your prayers each night 
So I hope to somehow say that in a small way my heart is like you
For though your son I’ve been still you’re my loving friend 
And I can’t image life alone without you